Monday, January 5, 2009

With This I Have A Problem


Tonight, I came to a conclusion. I've never been fanatical about organic food; I had enough salt-less, sugar-less, home ground wheat what-have-you as a child to have made me perpetually leery of that whole culture. But tonight, I reached a breaking point.

My chicken had bigger breasts than I do.

I was planning to make a nice, quick, semi-Mexican dinner, and so I pulled a couple of chicken breasts out of the freezer and realized that I was holding more meat than I could even begin to imagine eating for one meal. We had one breast split between us, and it was a little more than enough.

What are they feeding these poor chickens? And why don't they give the same hormones to women that get breast implants? Can the chickens walk around comfortably, or do they suffer from back problems? Is there some way that we can organize a charity that will provide bras to chickens who have undergone this treatment?

Anyway, I'm going to start getting my chicken somewhere where the breasts are smaller and don't make me feel inadequate.

1 comment:

Ann said...

This is a family area, young lady, and we don't want to know about the brazen and unnatural things you are doing with your slutty, large-breasted chickens.